man. i have zero interest in non-plus-size fashion blogs. like, oh, cool, you can shop anywhere and you managed to throw an outfit together? what a challenge. thrift stores and vintage shops everywhere are packed with clothes in your size from the last 40+ years and you bought a bunch of new shit at anthropologie? cool. interesting.

Allow me to translate: I have zero interest in non plus size fashion blogs because every time I see photos of healthy women or read a post about a healthy woman shopping at a normal store, I get reminded that I’m unhealthy and I should probably change even though it’s too much work.

Yeah you should only wear clothes if you’re healthy. Naturally, we reward health with the most access to clothing, which is why we have an entire industry that encourages people to starve themselves in order to fit into sample sizes. And that’s why Miu Miu didn’t want size 6 Mindy Kaling wearing their clothes. They could tell she wasn’t healthy enough.

Only healthy people should wear cool clothing. If you have a cold you better fucking strip. One time I was skinny but I had a sinus infection so I dolefully sold my Dolce & Gabbana and my Prabal Gurung.

I said, “why does my health have anything to do with what clothes I can and can’t wear?” And the police came and said, “THEM’S THE BREAKS, SNIFFLES, YOU CAN HAVE YOUR DRIES VAN NOTEN BACK WHEN YOU’RE NOT GETTING MUCUS ALL OVER IT. Shameful! Disgusting!”

In fact, even as a child, before I was fat, I had a disorder that prevented fiber from being turned into muscle, and I tried to buy some cool clothes at the Limited Too but they stopped me at the register. “Um excuse me, but we can’t let you buy this. You’re too unhealthy.”

"How the fuck do you know that?"

"We have a registry of all the unhealthy people on here. We can’t have our image of puppies and hearts and the Spice Girls be tainted by someone with a muscle disorder."

"I DIDN’T WANT THAT BUTTERFLY SHIRT ANYWAY!" I screamed, and as I did damage to my vocal cords an employee dutifully updated the system to note that.

I learned an important lesson that day. Health is only important if it gives you aesthetic advantages, and if you’re unhealthy everyone wants to see you naked.